Wednesday, May 12, 2010

The Dassie

I sat on the rooftop watching the night sky without seeing a star. I sat staring out the window of the moving van, missing all the wonders of the world that travelled by me. I sat crumpled on cold boulders waiting for the tears to come and willing the ocean’s power to absolve my aches. I sat and sat and sat.
The day before we left, I had made a phone call across the oceans, that was inspired by dreams of home. That phone call stole my breath away, as my not-forgotten mate had been heavy on my mind. The receiver had burned in my grip, as a picture was painted of my lover in another’s arms. The phone had seemed to jump from my hand and swung loosely, as my feet lead me away into the night. Anger swarmed me from all sides, but I walked out of its grip. Where I walked, I do not know. My lack of excitement at exploring this new land matched the gray horizons that I woke to. I had no heart to move forward and be, so just sat staring at the world around me through glazed eyes. On one hand, I had expected something like this, but on another I was shocked still. The days that had passed had presented me with offers. I had battled away from them, not sure where I was leading my travelling heart. Now it seemed obvious that I had orchestrated this all along, and I wondered what direction I was to move in next. Africa held my heart excitedly in its grip and beckoned me to stay today, tomorrow and forever more. I was numb. I let the world come and present to me what it would. It did not disappoint. A misty morning found some friends to keep me company on my last day in Mossel Bay before heading off down the coast to Jeffery’s Bay.

Dassie
Hello furry friends.
You come to smile at me.
You see a tear
Hang in my eye
“Pray disappear,”
I hear you cry.

But I must leave.
The porridge calls
And tea so cold
Will never go.

But blessed be you
For coming by.
You heard me sob.
You heard me cry.
I needed a friend
And this you knew.

The morning starts.
I say goodbye,
But I’ll hold you dear
For the silent hug of mine.

Go well.
Stay well.

8 comments:

  1. oh, this is heartbreaking...first the phone call...and then your little friends...

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  2. How sad, what a disappointment and heartbreak. Amazing the sensitivity of animals, how they know just what we need, and when they are pets they love unconditionally, at least dogs do.

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  3. Good Evening,
    pets are smart animals, sorry for your loss...we all have to handle losses at times.
    be strong, writing it out is one way to get relief...Best Regards.

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  4. How Tender and Poignant -- 'love is brief and the forgetting long' - there is a place for hiding and leaving the worries of the day - there is a place for dreaming of a better day - pull anchor and journey to that shore.

    Love this post even in it's sadness there is beauty spoken. The difficult gift is that your heart is open.

    Joanny

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  5. Haha! I have fooled you my friends. Well a little anyway. A Dassie was my friend that day, but was not a pet of mine. It is more akin to a badger. Here is a link for pictures. http://www.wildlifesafari.info/hyrax_rock.html
    And I thank you all for your concerns, but my heart survived this loss from many years ago. It survived and learned to love again, as I know I shall again. I am an optimist and hold out for rainbows.

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  6. i really enjoyed this, the interlude followed by the piece, heart breaking....& then I read your comments..damn you!!!!

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  7. Sorry Pete. All the emotions were very real and true at the time. I remember them well, but have left them there (well aside from bringing them alive for you). I was more laughing as the reference to "Dassie" was mistaken for a pet. It is also called a Hyrax. Thanks for visiting!
    And thank you Jingle!

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