Tuesday, September 7, 2010

letting go...

I am so spent.
gritty eyes not willing 
to look forth into
 the day any more.

how many years
 until I can do the fist pump
to the bus stop on
the first day of school?

Not today, yet.
Nor tomorrow at my guess,
but perhaps I will
by the last day of class.

^^^
Hey, what the heck. This Haiku-esque poem counts as enough for the night.  Both my babies started school for the first time today. My little white lie was that I was excited for them and that was why moisture was dripping off my chin. They don't need to know that this is another stop on the grief journey for me,
but I will survive...

I have already.


The school bus brought them home at the end of the day.
Together.

It will take them to school on their next day

and the day after that

and after that...

14 comments:

  1. I really liked this poem. My kids started last week back at school, but they are older. On the poem, syllables are expensive: I would take "so" out of the first line and move "on" down to the last line of the second stanza. Well done though!

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  2. Hugs, darling. It gets easier, I promise.
    xo

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  3. Oh, so sweet. I live across from a school, and work from home, so in the morning, I get to watch the little ones line up. I love the noise and bustle, as my own little ones are much older now (youngest is in 10th grade, other two are in college and beyond college).

    If you would like a laugh, come on over and see my poem at http://bit.ly/aP5JAR, but I promise it is nowhere near as touching.

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  4. SMILES. glad they had a good first day and that mommy survived it as well...it is old hat to my boys now...ack. still hate to see them go...nice one shot

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  5. It's hard to let them go but it has to be done. They are beautiful children.

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  6. My parents never told me about "school" until the day before I was to start kindergarten. I came home that day thinking I was done with that unseemly business, but then they told me I had to go back tomorrow too. I asked how long would I have to go, and they said UNTIL YOU ARE EIGHTEEN YEARS OLD! Talk about traumatic.

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  7. *Hey Joshua. I like your suggestions. Thank you so much for giving your honest critique. I was trying to play with syllables per line, but I agree that "so" doesn't offer much and the on might help continuity.

    *I will come visit the rest of you tomorrow, but after doing a tiny smidgen of work I think I need to rest my eyes. I hope the puffiness will be gone by morrow. Such an emotional day and I AM SPENT!

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  8. This brings back memories of our kids going off to school. No bus stop, though, we lived close enough to walk. Nice one.

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  9. Ahh, memories!

    (My son is 14 and just started high school)

    And you're right, it gets easier.

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  10. When I got to the end of the poem, I was thinking this one is so fitting for the beginning of the school year. Very touching, the afterward comments too.

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  11. I still am sad on the first day of school (my kids in college and high school).

    Precious for the beginning of the school year - thanks for the pics - they are such sweeties

    thanks for the delightful One Shot

    Moon hugs for you mama

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  12. that touched me...spent 6 weeks with mine driving me mad..first day back....and i missed them...i sure do understand how you feel but i have three years to my last starts and then i will by crying too..cheers pete

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  13. Thank you all for your sharing. I really do appreciate people's stories, as it reminds me that we do move on from those first days.
    * What a crummy way to find out about school Timoteo. Harsh!
    * Glynn don't get me talking about the bus! On day 2 of school today we had our first bus incidence. Grr
    *Moon hugs right back at you Leslie. Thanks.
    *I am liking the comments too Dustus
    *Pete, I will offer you as much tissue as you need!

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  14. Oh, it IS so sad. I remember every year taking the 1st day picture and hiding my nostalgia facing the next step away. The last one I took, kindof as a joke, was my son driving off for the first day of grad school last fall. A sweet poem!
    http://mairmusic.wordpress.com/

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