This week I feel the well is dry. Words are parched from my less than creative brain. I have exciting things coming up in my life. New opportunities that might spring up with a dollar or two attached to them. Spring has sprung, which means that I will be outside tending to the garden and looking for fairies behind new shoots and leaves. That is always a good meditation for my soul. Alas, I have been feeling hollow though when I look for more depth. I saw a couple of old acquaintances this morning and invariably the conversation got around to "So are you working?". My part-time work is wonderful, but elicits a crooked smile from others. It also elicits a groan from my bank account. My Spring renewal feels more like a returning to my roots of angst. I wonder if I will ever be good enough for me? I keep on judging me against the past and society's norms and am finding a hard sell to measure up. Perhaps a round of ohms on the yoga mat this afternoon will give me the boost I crave. Thanks for visiting.
Namaste
I am an old hat at measuring myself against someone else's standards and finding myself lacking...such a hard habit to break. It seems so simple: just don't. Ah, if only, right? Sigh.
ReplyDeleteHugs to you my dear...enjoy your yoga and your garden. You will never find perfection, so just keep looking for peace.
xoxo
Yoga & hugs a'sundry this aft have perked me up. Thanks C.
ReplyDeletewow so get this...My old group of NORMAL is so far removed from where I am now. Sometimes I have to fight to accept this is here and now and where I am meant to be!!!
ReplyDeletehope a little ray of sunshine finds you today...perhaps on the yoga mat. smiles.
ReplyDeleteIsn't it funny that when people ask questions like that we tend to take pause by their meaning? I'm sure that they didn't 'mean' anything by the remark...they were probably only making small talk. But it's how we percieve their comment that is bothersome.
ReplyDeleteI get this all the time. And still learning to deal with it.
:-)
Thanks for all the positive feedback my friends. My yoga did indeed perk me up, but so did your kind words. I agree "f8hasit" that they did not mean any slander by the comment. I just have a hard time shaking the "norm" of Mon-Fri, 9-5 mentality. The term "should" is a burden that I valiantly try not to let run my life, but I have to be aware of it. A work in progress...
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