Anger
bubbles through my soul.
caustic curses
that have torn strips off
Me
and loved ones
(my babies small)
Aghast again
venom pours through cursed lips
making me hate
~self~
that
much
m o r e
I know the cause
I know it is bigger,
deeper and more profound
than just a broken nail
blistered thumb
or spilt milk
no...
there is grief there
(familiar foe!)
always ready to push
scrape away esteem
like blowing dust
off my oft-forgotten
soul
somehow easier
to point fingers
backwards,
elsewhere...
blame time and me
as I sit sadly
alone
because when it comes down to it
am I not at fault?
is it not I
with power to hold tongue
to beseech higher powers
to give strength
understanding and love
nay
I crawl back into self
back unto my bed of nails
that I push into hands
eye and mouth
anything
to stop
stop
.
(perhaps words and fog
will make
these grumps
disappear)
and just so you know, I have hope that the fog will lift. It has just been heavy for the last few weeks. Go figure...
ReplyDeletesorry you are having a rough patch katherine
ReplyDelete@Brian: Frustrated by finicky family ties & depressed by death of my kitty. Add kids being irritating kids & the stack doesn't take much to blow the last two weeks. :(
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry you've got the megrims. Sometimes, there is just a final straw that won't be denied. Sending you big hugs.
ReplyDelete{{{{{YOU}}}}}
Very nice, thanks for sharing.
ReplyDelete@PattiKen: I tried to remedy my woes with a trip out of town to see my Mom, then my sister. While I am tired, I am feeling much better now. Thanks for the hugs Patti! Right back at you!
ReplyDelete