Sunday, September 12, 2010

A Little Piece of Heaven

My story resumes with a taste of home. A whiskey in hand, I reflected on days past from the warmth and security of Heaven Lodge in Chimanimani, Zimbabwe. Yes, truly a piece of Heaven after some of the domiciles we had been residing in recently. Mozambique lay behind us now though. It surely was not a dream, but so many of its qualities were too surreal to be believed. The poverty, landmines, potholes and pristine beaches all mixed together with extremely overt begging and acts of remarkable friendliness. Mozambique had been a lesson in living a larger life. Our final journey, ending  in a joyous dance of celebration upon reaching a petrol station, could not be squashed by a closed border for the night a few miles down the road. We still rode the high of triumph and another night in Mozambique could not disperse our success over the road from Hell. The morning sun offered us another example of the people’s warmth, with a man pointing out a nearby hostel where we could rest our head. Gratitude aside, we pushed on to a new country.
Zimbabwe held the promise of many things. My first brush with it, in Victoria Falls months earlier on the overland tour, had captivated me and I had been anticipating my return ever since.  First though, was a stop at Ann Bruce’s (Backpacker) House. Glory be, there was HOT, running water. Almost a distant memory, I reveled in this luxury. We also took in some game viewing, espying rhinoceros, giraffes, eland and ostrich, plus a magnificent sunset to round out the day. With Brett in our mind’s eye, we pushed on though. We assumed that we had time enough for a quick detour, before heading back up to Harare to meet up with him. This detour brought us to Chimanimani and a planned epic hike into the wilds of Zimbabwe. The whiskey warmed me up for the promised trek into Chimanimani National Park. I sat scribbling down my thoughts and adventures in a journal that was thankful for a sturdy table to be laid upon. With creative juices flowing, I was primed for adventure, but the lure of cards stole my resolve. I can never turn aside an invitation to the card table, so tucked my bottle under my arm and became friends with an English bloke and Kiwi couple. This night’s adventure was in runs, pairs and euchres. Modernity lured me in, but the mountains would find their revenge.

Friday, September 10, 2010

Smiles Forever Strong


First day of  new school
time for Momma to ease up
let girls be themselves

life will keep going
love will still flow freely on
smiles forever strong

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Day 2

I really shouldn't delve into this again. It will probably just get my feathers all rustled again, but... In blogland people often share tidbits about their day right? Yes, so;


wakeup to child crawling into bed with me
dry pants, so all good
alarm will go off in ten minutes
sigh...
awake now.

Breakfast
coffee, coffee
upper bathroom not clean yet, so still heading to basement to get clean
get clean
NO!! Don't run the water!!! You will scald Mommy! AhHHHHhhheeee
towel dry
brush teeth to prevent bad words from falling out of my lips
get dressed in my finest painting garb,
now turned to pants with the instantaneous change in seasons since Labour Day

Look at children
Look at clock
with 45 minutes before we have to leave to walk to bus
they have on rubber boots and coats
ready to go
waiting for tardy ole me
with 43 minutes before we have to leave
sigh...
a little excited they are indeed.

drag out hair drying, shoe finding, my lunch packing
leave 20 minutes early
offer home-made oatmeal chocolate chip cookies to the handy neighbour (yes, very yummy!)
slowly amble towards bus stop with 17 minutes to spare
wait, wait, wait
see bus approaching and mist up a bit
watch 60 some-odd kids push and shove onto bus, with the littlest ones inching on last
my two
seperate seats
driving away

I stay strong
go to work
leave work to pick up children

between my house and the bus stop my cell phone rings
"Are you R. L.'s Mom?"
my baby
"yes"
"She's not on the bus"
heart racing "WHAT?"
at the school, but daughter number 1 shall be arriving momentarily via the bus
"WHAT!!"
"A slight mix up"
"WHAT!!!!!"

Frantic Mother Bear flies into rage
collects eldest in vise-like grip sprinting home to the van
races to school mindful of other little feet on the road
finds evidence of daughter
eventually finds daughter with help of Vice Principal
NOT Happy Mommy
They can tell
I make sure

after the shaking subsides
I make dinner
safe in our bastion of care
meal not eaten to spite
yet again
nothing exciting or new for them
except gym class

phone lines were burned up with my venting
to safe spaces
to figure out what went wrong with today
and how I can make tomorrow a better day
a better new day

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Almost off "The List"

new floor grouted now
beautiful bathroom to be
baseboards still, then done?!


oh, plus add water
to taps that are not quite there.
Soon my worthy spa


Soon serenity,
splashing children in tub and 
Project off the list


Tuesday, September 7, 2010

letting go...

I am so spent.
gritty eyes not willing 
to look forth into
 the day any more.

how many years
 until I can do the fist pump
to the bus stop on
the first day of school?

Not today, yet.
Nor tomorrow at my guess,
but perhaps I will
by the last day of class.

^^^
Hey, what the heck. This Haiku-esque poem counts as enough for the night.  Both my babies started school for the first time today. My little white lie was that I was excited for them and that was why moisture was dripping off my chin. They don't need to know that this is another stop on the grief journey for me,
but I will survive...

I have already.


The school bus brought them home at the end of the day.
Together.

It will take them to school on their next day

and the day after that

and after that...

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