Wednesday, November 2, 2011

familiar foe

Anger
bubbles through my soul.
caustic curses
that have torn strips off
Me
and loved ones
(my babies small)

Aghast again
venom pours through cursed lips
making me hate
~self~
that
much
m o r e

I know the cause
I know it is bigger,
deeper and more profound
than just a broken nail
blistered thumb
or spilt milk
no...

there is grief there
(familiar foe!)
always ready to push
scrape away esteem
like blowing dust
off my oft-forgotten
soul

somehow easier 
to point fingers
backwards,
elsewhere...
blame time and me
as I sit sadly 
alone

because when it comes down to it
am I not at fault?
is it not I 
with power to hold tongue
to beseech higher powers
to give strength
understanding and love

nay
I crawl back into self
back unto my bed of nails
that I push into hands
eye and mouth
anything 
to stop 
stop
.


(perhaps words and fog 
will make 
these grumps
disappear

6 comments:

  1. and just so you know, I have hope that the fog will lift. It has just been heavy for the last few weeks. Go figure...

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  2. sorry you are having a rough patch katherine

    ReplyDelete
  3. @Brian: Frustrated by finicky family ties & depressed by death of my kitty. Add kids being irritating kids & the stack doesn't take much to blow the last two weeks. :(

    ReplyDelete
  4. I'm sorry you've got the megrims. Sometimes, there is just a final straw that won't be denied. Sending you big hugs.

    {{{{{YOU}}}}}

    ReplyDelete
  5. @PattiKen: I tried to remedy my woes with a trip out of town to see my Mom, then my sister. While I am tired, I am feeling much better now. Thanks for the hugs Patti! Right back at you!

    ReplyDelete

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