Monday, January 24, 2011

What's a Single Girl to Do?

I feel him kiss me
with his eyes – a warm caress
Every glance I get
Fingers massage a path of discovery
    tender excitement
All in a smile
   understood…

A brushed shoulder is electric
Soft phrases slide closer,
   more probing…
A promise of passion
   with metaphors.

Hands stroked.
Offers made,
   and accepted
Leave a glow in my mind
as I go to bed, tonight
Alone and untouched
   on the outside…

Ah, the false promises! Did I really fall for that? Could I not see through his slick ways? I suppose that loneliness makes for a desperate bedfellow, but really?! Thank heavens that I played coy long enough for him to move off to the next backpacker through the door though. I was getting enough attention, despite the fact that now Brett and I were travelling as a happy duo. No romance complicated our journey, just friends enjoying the open road together. The men of Harare seemed to be drawn to me like wildfire though.
“What’s a single girl to do?”, I smiled to myself as I counted out my roses in a makeshift vase. They numbered 9 and that didn’t include the one I lost, the one I gave away, the one that had wilted too soon and the red one without a stem that I had pressed between the pages of my journal. From many hands they had come, and I was tickled by all the interest.
With so much attention in such a short span (after not having had much for a while), I suppose it was understandable that I was flattered by Dean’s advances. Oh he, with the promise of passion for every lady that walked in the door of his father’s hostel! Was he really any worse than Ian though? They both did nothing more than “talk shit”, as the local guys I met liked to say. As long as I kept my head about myself, what did it hurt? Well… did it hurt Ian that I agreed to be his “woman”, when I was leaving the next day? Hmm. Ach, all a game, I fear.
The lure of romance, the excitement of bars, and city life filled my many days in Harare. I shopped and gathered mail from home, enjoying the break in motion. I dropped off my passport, in order to get a visa to cut through Mozambique on my way to Malawi. A delicious feast at an all-you-can-eat Mongolian restaurant pushed Brett over the edge though. He pushed away from the table fat and declared he was done with city life.
With a travel visa for Mozambique stamped in Brett’s passport, he left me to head for Malawi. My visa would not be in for a few days, so I tucked in to enjoy the ride solo, until we met up again three days hence. With a resolve of steal, I kept myself mostly out of harm’s way and by Tuesday I was on the 14-hour long bus ride from Harare to Blantyre, Malawi myself. Romance and Zimbabwe were left behind in the diesel-fumed dreams of youth.

10 comments:

  1. oh the first part is heavy hearted...the wily ways of love and those that would abuse it...i can appreciate that lonliness as well

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  2. Loved your poem, Katherine. It is nice to have your head turned...we need that sometimes.

    And I was laughing when I read this, "With a resolve of steal, I kept myself MOSTLY out of harm’s way," I think "mostly" speaks volumes here :)

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  3. @Brian: I was pretty close to giving in to temptation, but was glad I didn't when I saw how fast my slick friend moved on to the next girl in line with the same smarmy lines. The attention was good for my psyche though. Help me to face the day again with confidence.

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  4. @Talon: "It is nice to have your head turned...we need that sometimes."

    Whole-heartedly agree Talon! There is just something so warming about feeling the love, regardless of whether you pursue it or not. And as for my resolve, well, "What's a girl to do?" You have to let loose and have fun sometimes :)

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  5. I enjoyed the poem and your story.......I hope you have many more that make you smile in your future.

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  6. What a good story... Very realistic to what goes on in a woman's head when she is single long enough to long for attention... even if it's from an unworthy source

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  7. Sounds like you have managed yourself pretty well. And that you can see through all the BS swirling around you! Enjoyed this, Katherine. Thanks.

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  8. @Neva: Thanks Neva. I hope so too. I have been blessed with a smile or two since then, but am always open to new romance if it so chooses to offer itself to me. :)

    @SY: Don't you know it SY! I like to think of myself as strong and independent, but a girl has weaknesses too, right!

    @bodhirose: Welcome Bodhirose. I did thank you. Temptation was strong, but good sense gave me pause just long enough. Thanks for stopping by. Just so you know, this is part of a much longer story of my travels through Africa a few years back. There is a link on the side bar that takes you back through the story if you are interested. I am also trying to post a new segment of the story every Monday now. Enjoy!

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  9. "Thank heavens that I played coy long enough for him to move off to the next backpacker through the door though."

    Good for you, Katherine!

    I work with a girl who visited Italy and she said that she had to contend with the same thing from the Italian men. She was flattered by the attention, but NEVER gave in!

    Fabulous poem!

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  10. @Ron: Thanks Ron. That was a poem that I wrote while in Harare, so many years ago. I wrote it before I realized that dear Dean was a bit of a cough slut (shall we say?) I was flattered by the attention and really don't know how I kept my willpower so strong. All good things come to those that wait, I guess. :) and your post today totally slayed me again. You are hilarious my good man!

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